I was going through the posts on my facebook wall yesterday and pretty much cried my eyes out seeing my cousin’s wished me happy birthday too. Just a week ago. And I only saw it yesterday, because I was living an off-life. Just one week and I cannot thank him anymore.
Hopefully I replied all others who have been kind enough to think of me that day. ❤
My birthday’s been pretty great though. The Dominican Republic is a beautiful place and the people are totally kind and nice and not even near as pushy as eg. Kenyan people. Okay, I may have had way too much negative experience in Kenya. (And still, I’m not against going back someday.)
My Spanish still sucks, not as if I prepared much for the trip. I did not want to believe it until I got there afterall. And even the day before it was not sure we could actually go.
I haven’t even looked at my camera yet, so I don’t have a clue how many or what kind of photos I managed to take. (Most probably like a thousand of the beach and water that’s not good for much and maybe a palmful of other stuff. XD) I’ve got my super-poser pic with my pretty bruise I only realized I had on the plane. Perfect for the beach. LOL Our lil’ trolls told me it’s the perfect “accessorie” to pick up guys. As if there were any guys worthy of picking up… ^_^’ And I managed to take a selfie on which it looks like I got new boobs for my birthday… I haven’t decided yet if I wanted to start an insta-hoe carreer with that. xD
I managed to keep up with my latest insta project and I totally managed to finish it on time. Wow! *patting myself on the head* Now I’m fed up with Instagram again. XD We’ll see when I’ll feel like posting stuff again. But… I realized I like the concept of the stories. It’s kind of fun that they disappear after a day.
So… I’ve been hanging too much with these trolls, I’ve got the greatest idea for the perfect Easter-covid prank. It is hilarious, my friends agree with me on this as well as on that it’s probably legally punishable – or however you say it. I’m pretty sure though I could pull it off in a way that I don’t get caught, but I won’t do it anyway. Kind of hoping someone else will… I know I’m mean. So, the thing is… I remember that Counterfeit et al. party years ago. And I remember someone with a T-shirt that had some serious bullshit on it and I remember how disturbed my little mourning soul got, how incredibly crap it felt that some people who are probably way too young to understand real loss show off their rebellion or whatever they felt like showing off with something that offending. And my prank would probably hurt a lot more people, especially these times when most people are emotionally drained, scared, totally stressed out etc. *sigh* Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
I’ve just watched Prince of Persia again – I pretty much know it by heart, but whatever – and now I’m listening to the Poets of the fall. It started with realizing they just premiered a new song a few days ago. And it’s a nice one – again – and I know how their music just soothes my lil’ disturbed soul and it’s working. As almost always.
A decade ago I saw the “living dead” 4 days before he passed away. And I was happy he finally died, because it was better this way. Now I’m kind of happy I did not see his son, but I’m sure it’s better this way. No more suffering at least. It does not make it any better though… But at least it was a shorter period of time while waiting for the final “news”. 5 years ago it felt like a lifetime, cramps in the stomach every time the phone rang etc. … Pfff… I still haven’t managed to finish that blogpost about death that I started long-long ago.
But back to life… because that would be the whole point of this thing… we should live while we are alive. We should live a life that’s worth remembering/looking back at. Maya’s been a drama queen about covid stealing a year of her life. Err… You did steal a year of your life with locking yourself up in your apartment and staring at the TV this past year. I accept that it’s more scary, and more difficult to some people than to others, but fear paralyzes us. I know. The memory just came to my mind, when in September I finaly could go flying and my instructor showed me how I should kneel down on the steel netting and how I should almost sit back on my heels and he was basically showing me moves that I was avoiding as if my life depended on it in the previous 1,5 years. And I was scared like hell of another injury, but we can’t always just let the fear win. Like, a bit of healthy fear is okay, but being scared all the time? No thanks. I’ve had enough of that. I can’t control everything, I cannot be 100% prepared for all possibilities all the time and it’s okay. This past year has been unpredictable for all of us – most of us? Unpredictable and different can feel scary, but they hold a lot of possibilities.
I may have messed up a great opportunity with not being in Egypt as of right now. I’ve turned the offer down twice and then one more time it came back more tempting than before. And I was totally freaked out. My friends asked me how it was different from the Dubai or the UK projects… And besides the fact that I’m a decade older now… LOL OMG… *facepalm* I managed to calm my anxiety and came to very interesting and pretty important conclusions concerning my MUA “career” – namely that it’s over. It’s fun, and it was nice when I was into it, but it really is over. I’m not a real MUA material, I’ve never been that excited about it, it’s never been “my life” like it is for so many others. So I just let it go. It’s nice for a hobby. And well… I’m not in Egypt now and I don’t mind it.
People around me were shocked to hear the plans and news, OMG we are travelling. In pandemic times. Aren’t we afraid? We’re all going to die etc… I’ll die sooner if I’m just locked up in my corner while crying over how we are all going to die. Hint: most probably we ALL are going to die. At some time in our lives. And we are back to that pretty interesting point that until that unfortunate (?) moment we should just live. Enjoy life. Be happy. And stuff. (Might be I’m not the best inspirational speaker of our times. xD)
I may be too shocked about the news. Or I may have gone crazy. Or maybe I’m just alright. One minute I cry my eyes out then I calm down and feel extremely happy and fortunate and greatful for being alive and for having such an awesome life. And it does not mean I did not love my cousin. Like there were moments in life, probably longer than moments… When I myself just wanted to beat him up for being stupid and disappointing as hell and stuff… Not all stories are meant to be shared publicly… But he used to be my fave cousin (until I got to meet Adrian I guess LOL) and it’s just not okay… It hardly ever is okay, but as Dominicans look at it, when someone passes away after a nice long fulfilled life, it’s sad, but it’s okay. I wish I saw more of that kind of passing away… I’m pretty sure Jani’s was not that fulfilled and happy… And that part is crap. Almost heartbreaking…
I think I’ll just opt for a salty bath… I’ve been exercizing for more than an hour. Yesterday I was eating instead of working out, but oh well. It’s in the past and even I cannot be perfect (all the time). So I don’t have a clue when my suit fitting is going to be, but up until then I’m trying my best to get back into shape. To the best shape I manage to achieve. Once again lockdown does not help much, but whatever. I need to be more flexible in all means. I’ve became so stiff it’s untenable. Mainly physically though, I believe I’ve became a lot more flexibe mentally this past year.
I had high hopes concerning the trip. The plan was I’m getting my hair braided again. Not for 400 USD though as I saw the pricing on the hotel’s site. When talking to the hairdressers at the hotel they offered a generous 250 USD price for full braids with extensions, but honestly, I haven’t seen any really nice braids while being in Dominica and after my Kenyan braids, my expectations are pretty high. So no braids this time. C’est la vie. I also thought I’d start kite-surfing in Dominica and honestly I do not have a clue why I haven’t seen anyone kite-surfing anywhere. Obviously I don’t know much about kite-surfing so there must be a reason behind this and I guess it was better for my shoulders anyway. Not to mention (obv. I’m mentioning it) Yumi’s note on my bruised photo – she thought it was the result of my first kite-surfing, because last time she saw bruises like that it was kite-surfing. Err… XQZme??? Why can’t I just find a hobby that’s not destructive? Like, why can’t I just fall for cooking or chess? Okay… cooking can be totally destructive. But it at least is useful. It can get expensive, but really… it at least is good for something. Khm… So… We’ll see if I’ll ever get any near to kite-surfing. But… No way I’m giving up flying. I don’t know when I’ll be able to go again, but something really clicked in me a year ago… Like really. LOL *facepalm*
It’s interesting though, cause there were options for parasailing in Dominica and somehow it did not really raise my interest. But! I’ve been watching the helicopters come and go all the time and for some reason a flight school (the one Tomika’s enrolled to) started following me on Instagram and they are advertising their helicopter courses and well… I don’t plan on learning to fly a heli anytime soon, but that did pick my interest. I just don’t see how that could be a good idea. We’ll see what the future holds.
I’ve tried ziplining, I jumped into a beautifully blue lake, swam in a cave (again – now without losing a piece of my toe), watched whales, broke my snorkelling mask again (don’t ask, I don’t have a clue how) and survived an almost full day on water with only one pill. Oh WOW! Yeah. It’s not your usual motion sickness pill though. It’s some serious stuff the doctor prescribes and… well… not for motion sickness, but it works wonders and as I’m not planning on taking it as sweets on a daily basis (not as if I were eating sweets on a daily basis) I won’t worry much about it. I may have my chance to spend full days on open waters without “losing a life” I’ll just need to talk my doctor to prescribe it to me… That’s gonna be tricky. xD
Okay, I’m babbling too much. I still haven’t unpacked my suitcase and for a change I’ve got a number of creative projects to work on. I’ll also have to do something about shedding like a snake. Sexy, I say, sexy! \m/
Heads up! This whole crap is temporary. It’s spring already and spring brings us all new beginnings! ;P
+++ May your soul rest in peace Jani +++
xoxo D.
Listen to: Rochi RD – Mi contacto
(note: this is best on good sound systems on high volume ;P)
D for Diamond 